Goals Are Dreams With Action Steps....What's yours? What's your First Step?

 

Creating S.M.A.R.T. Goals

Specific

Measurable

Attainable

Realistic

Timely

Specific: A specific goal has a much greater chance of being accomplished than a general goal. To set a specific goal you must answer the six “W” questions:
*Who:      Who is involved?
*What:     What do I want to accomplish?
*Where:    Identify a location.
*When:     Establish a time frame.
*Which:    Identify requirements and constraints.
*Why:      Specific reasons, purpose or benefits of accomplishing the goal.
EXAMPLE:  A general goal would be, “Get in shape.” But a specific goal would say, “Join a health club and workout 3 days a week.”

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Measurable - Establish concrete criteria for measuring progress toward the attainment of each goal you set.
When you measure your progress, you stay on track, reach your target dates, and experience the exhilaration of achievement that spurs you on to continued effort required to reach your goal.
To determine if your goal is measurable, ask questions such as……
How much? How many?
How will I know when it is accomplished?

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Attainable – When you identify goals that are most important to you, you begin to figure out ways you can make them come true. You develop the attitudes, abilities, skills, and financial capacity to reach them. You begin seeing previously overlooked opportunities to bring yourself closer to the achievement of your goals.
You can attain most any goal you set when you plan your steps wisely and establish a time frame that allows you to carry out those steps. Goals that may have seemed far away and out of reach eventually move closer and become attainable, not because your goals shrink, but because you grow and expand to match them. When you list your goals you build your self-image. You see yourself as worthy of these goals, and develop the traits and personality that allow you to possess them.

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Realistic- To be realistic, a goal must represent an objective toward which you are both willing and able to work. A goal can be both high and realistic; you are the only one who can decide just how high your goal should be. But be sure that every goal represents substantial progress.
A high goal is frequently easier to reach than a low one because a low goal exerts low motivational force. Some of the hardest jobs you ever accomplished actually seem easy simply because they were a labor of love.

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Timely – A goal should be grounded within a time frame. With no time frame tied to it there’s no sense of urgency. If you want to lose 10 lbs, when do you want to lose it by? “Someday” won’t work. But if you anchor it within a timeframe, “by May 1st”, then you’ve set your unconscious mind into motion to begin working on the goal.
Your goal is probably realistic if you truly believe that it can be accomplished. Additional ways to know if your goal is realistic is to determine if you have accomplished anything similar in the past or ask yourself what conditions would have to exist to accomplish this goal.
T can also stand for Tangible – A goal is tangible when you can experience it with one of the senses, that is, taste, touch, smell, sight or hearing.
When your goal is tangible you have a better chance of making it specific and measurable and thus attainable.

Focus On What you Have Control Over..For Positive Outcomes.

Power Of Positive thinking

'Thoughts Become Words, Words Become Actions"

The Power of Positive Attitude

By Remez Sasson

Positive attitude helps to cope more easily with the daily affairs of life. It brings optimism into your life, and makes it easier to avoid worry and negative thinking. If you adopt it as a way of life, it will bring constructive changes into your life, and makes them happier, brighter and more successful. With a positive attitude you see the bright side of life, become optimistic and expect the best to happen. It is certainly a state of mind that is well worth developing and strengthening.

Positive attitude manifests in the following ways:

Positive thinking.

Constructive thinking.

Creative thinking.

Expecting success.

Optimism.

Motivation to accomplish your goals.

Being inspired.

Choosing happiness.

Not giving up.

Looking at failure and problems as blessings in disguise.

Believing in yourself and in your abilities.

Displaying self-esteem and confidence.

Looking for solutions.

Seeing opportunities.

A positive attitude leads to happiness and success and can change your whole life. If you look at the bright side of life, your whole life becomes filled with light. This light affects not only you and the way you look at the world, but also your whole environment and the people around you. If it is strong enough, it becomes contagious.

The benefits of a positive attitude:

Helps achieving goals and attaining success.

Success achieved faster and more easily.

More happiness.

More energy.

Greater inner power and strength.

The ability to inspire and motivate yourself and others.

Fewer difficulties encountered along the way.

The ability to surmount any difficulty.

Life smiles at you.

People respect you.

Negative attitude says: you cannot achieve success.

Positive attitude says: You can achieve success.

If you have been exhibiting a negative attitude and expecting failure and difficulties, it is now the time to change the way you think. It is time to get rid of negative thoughts and behavior and lead a happy and successful life. Why not start today? If you have tried and failed, it only means that you have not tried enough.

Developing a positive attitude that will lead you to happiness and success:

- Choose to be happy.

- Look at the bright side of life.

- Choose to be and stay optimistic.

- Find reasons to smile more often.- Have faith in yourself and in the Power of the Universe.

- Contemplate upon the futility of negative thinking and worries.

- Associate yourself with happy people.

- Read inspiring stories.

- Read inspiring quotes.

- Repeat affirmations that inspire and motivate you.

- Visualize only what you want to happen.

- Learn to master your thoughts.

- Learn concentration and meditation.

Following even only one of the above suggestions, will bring more  into your life!

Try It for a day.....Win that Day ...Then try it again!

"The game of life is a game of boomerangs. Our thoughts, deeds and words return to us sooner or later with astounding accuracy."Florence Scovel Shinn

The Mental Health Benefits of Gratitude

The Mental Health Benefits of Gratitude  

                                                                     Michael Craig Miller, M.D.

The word gratitude comes from the Latin word gratia, which means grace, graciousness or gratefulness (depending on the context). In some ways gratitude encompasses all of these meanings.

Gratitude is a thankful appreciation for what a person receives, whether tangible or intangible. With gratitude, people acknowledge the goodness in their lives. In the process, they usually recognize that the source of that goodness lies at least partially outside themselves. As a result, gratitude also helps people connect to something larger than themselves— whether to other people, nature or a higher power.

Researchers who study gratitude find that it is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people:

    Feel more positive emotions

    Relish good experiences

    Improve their health

    Deal with adversity

    Build strong relationships

People feel and express gratitude in many ways. They may be grateful for past experiences and memories and for their present circumstances (not taking good fortune for granted as it comes). Maintaining a hopeful and optimistic attitude is a way people can have gratitude for the future.

Most important, a person can practice gratitude and develop it.

Research on Gratitude

Two psychologists, Dr. Robert A. Emmons of the University of California, Davis and Dr. Michael E. McCullough of the University of Miami, have done much of the research on gratitude.

In one study, they asked groups of participants to write a few sentences each week. One group wrote about things they were grateful for that had occurred during the week. A second group wrote about daily irritations or things that had displeased them, and the third wrote about events that had affected them (with no emphasis on them being positive or negative). After 10 weeks, those who wrote about gratitude were more optimistic and felt better about their lives. Surprisingly, they also exercised more and had fewer visits to physicians than those who focused on sources of aggravation.

Dr. Martin E. P. Seligman of the University of Pennsylvania tested the impact of various positive psychology interventions. Subjects in his research had to write and personally deliver a letter of gratitude to someone who had never been properly thanked for his or her kindness. Participants immediately displayed a huge increase in happiness scores (compared to a control group). This impact was greater than that from any other intervention, with benefits lasting for a month.

This research does not prove cause and effect. But most of the studies published on this topic support an association between gratitude and an individual's well-being.

Other studies have looked at how gratitude can improve relationships. For example, a study of couples found that people who took time to express gratitude for their partner not only felt more positive toward the other person, but also felt more comfortable expressing concerns about their relationship.

Managers who remember to say "thank you" to people who work for them may find that those employees feel motivated to work harder. Researchers at the Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania randomly divided university fundraisers into two groups. One group made phone calls to solicit alumni donations in the same way they always had. The second group — assigned to work on a different day — received a pep talk from the director of annual giving, who told the fundraisers she was grateful for their efforts. During the following week, the university employees who heard her message of gratitude made 50% more fundraising calls than those who did not.

How To Cultivate Gratitude

Gratitude helps people refocus on what they have instead of what they lack. And, although it may feel contrived at first, this mental state grows stronger with use and practice.

The following strategies are simplistic, but they are indeed ways to cultivate gratitude on a regular basis:

    Write thank-you notes. You can make yourself happier and nurture your relationship with another person by writing thank-you notes when you have received something from them that you enjoy. Also write one any time a person has had a positive influence on your life. Saying thank you in person may be more powerful. It's more than good manners to make a habit of saying thank you; you'll feel better too.

    Thank someone mentally. It may help also to think about someone who has done something nice for you, and mentally thank the individual. If you think it's appropriate, follow up with a note that might start, "I was thinking of you the other day, about the time you helped me …"

    Keep a "gratitude journal." Make it a habit to write down or share with a loved one thoughts about the advantages you have or the ways others have been generous with you. Think about what has gone right for you or what you are grateful for. Identify three to five things. As you write, be specific and think about the feelings you had when something good happened to you.

    Pray. People who are religious can use prayer to cultivate gratitude.

    Meditate. Mindfulness meditation involves focusing on the present moment without judgment. Although a very common technique is to focus on your breath, it is also possible to focus on what you're grateful for (the warmth of the sun, a pleasant sound, and so on).

Don't wait for Thanksgiving or religious holidays to practice these routines. Make them a constant part of your life and you may be rewarded daily.

***Michael Craig Miller, M.D. is the former editor-in-chief of the Harvard Mental Health Letter and an assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. Dr. Miller has an active clinical practice and has been on staff at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center for more than 30 years.

To All Our Veterans........

Happy Halloween!!

No One Else Can Raise Your Self Esteem....It Starts With You.

Material Taken from the Book "Life's Greatest Lessons" Hal Urban
The Chapter  titled ' No One  Else Can Raise Your Self_ Esteem"
Recovery Wellness @ The Circle Thursday 1/17/2013 L.P.Sterling BHP

" Self Esteem is that deep-down inside the skin feeling you have of your own self worth"
Denis Waitly

In Mr. Urbans 'lessons on self esteem, he brings up several important facts  to ponder. In referencing the  above quote, He suggests that real self esteem in not something another person can give you,but suggests, its how we truly feel about ourselves when nobody else is around.
By itself, the word : "esteem" means to appreciate, to hold in high regard, to have genuine respect.
 So self esteem he suggests, really means  self -respect. it's how we feel about ourselves,regardless of what others  say. It's building our own character,.............both a choice and a responsibility.

Mr. Urban tells us "Other people in your life may hinder OR help you, BUT we build our own character,and with it, we determine our level of self esteem.....it's strictly an inside job" .
 From Dependance to Independence

" There is a  time in our lives, when both our self -image and our self -esteem are determined by other  people.When we are  small, we are dominated by the adults and older children that we are surrounded by. We create habits and  start to see ourselves through the messages  we hear from them.  Good messages, good self esteem. Bad messages, bad self esteem.We tend to become what we are told.
The most important thing  to learn is  that ,as we get older, we have to learn to think for ourselves"....
Pointing one finger out , needs  to be the reminder that the  three  coming back at you is  where you have  to start.
It's what /who you have control over and its' who can create new thoughts, beliefs and behaviors. you have  control over.
Elenor Roosevelt once stated : "No one  can make  you feel inferior without your consent"
Mr. Urban  took this  quote and  tells  us "It would  follow then , that nobody can make  us  feel anything  either without our consent" ' He reminds us  that  while its' great to be appreciated, and loved, and affirmed by others, we can not sit around and  wait for others approval. We have  to empower ourselves  to implement things  into our lives  that  make us feel good about ourselves, even without anyone looking or knowing  He suggests, that  when we are rewarded from our own positive actions, the result is we feel good ...from within...not  putting your self esteem in the hands of an "opinion". Others can do much to make us feel good, it's true, but Real Self esteem is respect we have to earn from ourselves."
Once again actions, implemented, build character,self respect and self esteem.
The Main Ingredients of Self  Esteem
 Mr. Urban goes on to say:
" Actually the ingredients of self esteem are so basic and  simple, we often miss it. Despite what the self styles gurus might be saying,truth is ,self esteem is part of a natural process. If you can be consistent in the following four areas of your life,you will never have to worry about healthy self esteem...It will be your constant companion".
1. Be Kind.
It's impossible  to feel good about ourselves  when we are mean,selfish or insensitive to others. How we deal with others , has a mirror effect. The we treat others, the better  we feel.The more we learn to affirm others, the more we grow.People build lives on foundations of respect.
2.Be Honorable
'I admit I have not read about honesty being connected to self esteem, however, I am convinced that iit is essential.I do know that integrity is the corner stone of  high self esteem. As long as you have integrity, you will have  the respect of others and yourself. "
3.Be Productive
One of the seven deadly sins was referred to as 'sloth', which means to be idle or lazy. We know when we are giving our best and we know  when we  are slacking off. Being productive daily, at something  is what builds self esteem. "
Find a way every day that when you look back at your day, there was something that you did  for your own or another persons benefit...make it a habit.
4.Be Positive
We can not feel good about selves or anything,if  we allow our heads to fill with negative thoughts. They may come, but  you have a choice.Give yourself credit for everything, focus on what  you can  do , focus on a forward  direction...daily. Remember, attitude is a  choice,the most important day choice you make"

 All things splendid have been achieved by those who dared believe that something inside them was superior to circumstance. ~Bruce Barton

Start today.

Foods and Drinks that can Trigger Panic and Anxiety Attacks

If you have a hard  time  with anxiety....Maybe looking at  diet can help you to implement good healthy habits that empower  you to make an impact on feeling better. Remember Small Changes make a big difference.

Try and eat a healthy, whole foods diet with plenty of fresh vegetables and fruits. Try and include foods that are rich in the B vitamins, such as whole grains, nuts, green vegetables, eggs and fish

To help lift moods and help calm anxiety, keep away from processed foods and eat more natural products.

The following are triggers, moderate or avoid:

Caffeine

Your favorite pick me up has two effects upon the body which can result in an increase in your anxiety levels. One side effect of your caffeine habit is to block adenosine, a protein found throughout the body. Adenosine regulates the firing of neurons in different brain regions. It is what causes you to get drowsy. Caffeine interferes with this process and causes the firing of neurons to increase. This triggers the pituitary gland to produce adrenaline because the gland thinks an emergency is occurring. This increase in adrenaline can cause and increase your anxiety symptoms.

Caffeine also increases the lactic acid levels in the bloodstream. Studies have shown that high accumulations of lactic acid in the body can increase anxiety and cause panic attacks. If you suffer from panic or anxiety attacks it might be time to rethink your daily java or soda fix. Wean yourself off slowly to reduce the chance of experiencing withdrawal symptoms.  Green Tea is a good low caffeine alternative. Limit coffee to 300 mgs…that is 3 6 oz. cups of caffeine a  day.

Sugar

Sugar can cause a dramatic increase in anxiety. Like caffeine, sugar can cause lactic acid to build up in the bloodstream. In addition, the ingestion of sugar causes a release of insulin which decreases blood glucose. This causes mood swings and agitation. If you suffer from anxiety you should limit your sugar intake and try to eat complex carbohydrates like whole grains. Also, try eating smaller meals throughout the day. Limit Sugar to 40- 50 grams. A day…4 grams  equals 1 teaspoon , so about 10 teaspoons a day is ok.

Food to Avoid: Candy

Of course, almost everyone likes sweets, and sweets (including those containing table sugar, honey, and corn syrup) can make us feel better, but again it’s a temporary lift. Here’s why: Sugar is absorbed quickly into the bloodstream. The absorption causes an initial high or surge of energy. But that surge wears off as the body increases its insulin production to remove the sugar from your bloodstream. The result: You’re left feeling tired and low.

Food to Avoid: Hot Dogs/Processed Foods

Could processed foods such as hot dogs, sausage, pie, and cakes cause anxiety or other mental issues? Researchers in London found that eating a diet of processed and fatty foods increases the risk for depression. In the study, people who mainly ate fried food, processed meat, high-fat dairy products, and sweetened desserts had a 58 percent higher risk of depression than those who ate “whole” foods such as fish and vegetables. It’s best for your mood, says Villacorta, to skip the over-processed foods.

Avoid fizzy drinks loaded with sugar, instead drink plenty of water, I am personally not a big fan of water and drink the flavored variety which is fine also. Avoid caffeine too much caffeine, again there is no need to give it up completely, just try and moderate it.

MSG

Is a chemical additive that  aggravates the nervous system.

Lactic Acid

Lactic acid occurs naturally in your body after a strenuous workout. Your body stores this lactic acid and it crystalizes in your muscles causing the soreness.

Below is a small list of foods to avoid and which foods to keep on your side when you are feeling anxious or stressed. Again I don't expect you to be perfect as I was not, but a few changes may help you see the benefit.

Foods to eat

Yogurt   Banana Vegetable  Wholegrain foods Brown Rice Beans Turkey Chicken Cottage Cheese Fresh Fish  Poached Egg  Tuna Fruit  Porridge  Baked potato  Peanut butter  Garlic  Spinach

Exercise

While it may seem contradictory for me to list exercise right after lactic acid, I have found exercise to be remarkably beneficial in alleviating the symptoms of anxiety, fear, panic and stress. Your body’s natural fight or flight mode automatically releases adrenaline in your system, increasing your heart rate and blood pressure. It’s preparing it to fun or fight. Exercise is a great, healthy, natural way to release that built up adrenaline in your system. Plus, it releases the natural endorphins in your system, creating a sense of peace and rest in your body.

Try making one  change at a time…..What positive food or drink can you  add to your healthy recovery effort this week?

Resources: http://www.mdjunction.com/forums/panic-attacks-discussions/general-support/10091502-foods-and-drinks-that-can-trigger-panic-and-anxiety-attacks

Group Material for Recovery Skills development and Healthy Living Group Skills class @ The Circle

Presented By L.P.Sterling BHP January 30, 2013